MOVING DAY!!!!!

Well the day has arrived, finally I am moving out of my mums place and will be a fresh new start :) all my stuff is packed and I have a sense of relief. I am planning to start fresh by starting a new healthy new life style and to give this body the care and respect it deserves :) I am not going to go full steam ahead, just take each day as it comes. I have given my self a goal and that is by the time I am 30 (almost 3 years away) I want to be the healthiest I have ever been and settled and content within my self and my surroundings. 3 years seems along time but enough time to achieve a lot of stuff. Hope you all have a fab week.

Monkey xx

What triggers fear and aniexty????

I have always wondered about this question, when I have suffered panic and anxiety, and thought how is it some people are more prone to attacks than other people? You see so many confident people about and I always think " I want to be like that", and " I wonder if they ever panic" which is silly really cos fear and panic is your bodies way off telling you something is wrong .Looking back on times when panic could of been measured on a richter scale, I always remember I got through it. Recently I have been looking into what outside factors make these situations worst such as giving up smoking decreases anxiety by 50% as the oxygen needed to overcome an attack is made harder grasp because of all the crap running the my blood vessels instead of the much needed oxygen, also caffeine which I am sure everyone is aware off, brings anxiety up which is a bit of a bitch because I love my coffee, but learnt that to much is not good, as the old saying goes "to much of a good thing can be bad". Another thing which I have been reading about is cognitive behavioural therapy which tackles issues head on with a sense of achievement getting through yours fears and triggers, I have found this quite interesting to read about as I said at the start of this blog " I got through it". In some issues if a situation is bad it is a good idea to take yourself away from it, but if there is a chance you can face it head on the sense of relief and self achievement can be amazing. Recent events and going back to square one (Housing issues, confidence and financial) have made me realise that being back at square one is good place to start, a new lease so to speak. I keep reminding myself there are worst off people in the world and I am lucky to have what I have and should be thankful for the people in my life (which I am greatly!) A word of advice, if something is going on in your life and it seems there is nothing out there , seek help whether it be from friends or family, the support will guide you through tough times, there is nothing worst than going through something alone, I have learnt this in more ways than one, and thank every single person that helped me through bad times. I have to admit I am loving writing blogs LOL expect more from this monkey boy :) Ps they all wont be about bad things there are good times ahead, and I want to share them.

Love Matt xx

Life so far.

How do you spring back when life has thrown you some rough patches? I am now 27 and really am not where I thought I would be in life. Some people may say I moan and dwell on things a lot, which I do actually do, but when you suffer from panic and confidence issues it so hard to spring back to the state of mind I actually want to be in. I am recently starting to learn self value and worth which is really good, but hard at the same time. I am trying to do things which test my confidence and try to push the boundaries of it, soon going back to work is my biggest challenge. I have had so many jobs it untrue, and never really found my feet in a career. Retail has been the background for most of my jobs, I do love the environment and the face to face service of people, but the pay does not stand well with living on your own and trying to have a life as well. Two things i have promised myself this year are 1. Take my time to find a good job rather than rushing into one, 2. to find my confidence that I used to have being a bubbly fun loving monkey :0) I am blessed with amazing friends who have done so much for me and I wish I could do more for them and know one day I will. As for my love life, well that is another story, but I have decided to find myself before I find someone, I have never been happy single but want to learn how and to respect my own company and find the potential I have always wanted. This blog may sound a self involved but that is the idea right? I thought this is a good way to read back on things and to share with others someone's life and stories, so watch this space :)

Love Matt x